Okay, Let's Talk About Money for a Second

"We don't see things as they are, we see them as we are." — Anaïs Nin

Okay, Let's Talk About Money for a Second

Real talk.

When I talk to people in their 20s — like, actually talk to them, not just scroll past their highlight reels — money comes up. Every. Single. Time.

And not in some vague "ugh, adulting" way. It's specific. It's "how do I make this paycheck actually last until the next one." It's "what happens if my car breaks down — do I even have a plan for that." And somewhere in there, usually said a little quieter, like it's a secret: "...am I supposed to be thinking about retirement already??"

(Yes. Sorry. But also — keep reading, because this isn't gonna be that kind of post.)

Here's where I want to start, though. Not with budgets. Not with apps. Not with some 12-step plan to "fix your finances."

I want to start with your money mindset. Or — what I like to call your money story.

Wait, what's a "money story"?

It's basically all the stuff you believe about money that you never actually chose. Somebody handed it to you — probably before you were even old enough to ask questions about it.

Maybe money was never talked about in your house. Total silence. Or maybe it was talked about ALL the time, usually right before or after a fight. Maybe you grew up hearing "we can't afford that" so often it became part of your personality. Or maybe the message was "money isn't something nice people care about" — so now you feel weird even wanting more of it.

Whatever the message was, it's probably still in there. Running quietly in the background every time you check your bank account, every time you think about asking for a raise, every time you buy something for yourself and immediately feel a little guilty about it.

Here's the thing though — money is one of the most important relationships in your life. You deal with it every single day. And like any relationship, it can mess with your head... or it can actually feel fine. Good, even.

You don't have to be stressed about this all the time

I promise.

The first move isn't a spreadsheet. It's getting honest about where you're actually at with money right now — no judgment, just curiosity.

So grab your phone notes app, a napkin, whatever — and sit with these for a sec:

• What's the first money memory you've got? Was it tense? Chill? Did anyone even talk about it?

• What did you hear about money growing up — and be honest, do you still say some of those exact same things?

• When you check your bank account... what's the vibe? Dread? Avoidance? Are you a "check it 47 times a day" person, or a "rather not know" person?

• Do you actually talk about money with people you trust — or does it feel like one of those topics you're not "supposed" to bring up?

• If money had zero shame or stress attached to it, how would you actually want to feel about it?

Healthy or not — either way, you've got somewhere to start

Once you sit with those, you'll probably notice a pattern. Maybe your relationship with money is actually pretty solid — cool, keep doing that.

Or maybe it's a little more complicated than you realized. Also cool. That's not a failure, that's just information.

Usually it boils down to one of two things: either there's a knowledge gap — you don't actually understand how something works, so it feels scary — or there's a story gap — you've never really talked about money out loud with anyone, so you assume everyone else has it figured out and you're the only one white-knuckling it.

Both of those? Totally fixable. Knowledge gaps close with information. Story gaps close with conversation.

And honestly — that's kind of the whole point of this space. Nobody handed us a manual for this stuff. So let's figure it out together. No judgment, no jargon, just real talk.